Important Updates Re: Bryson’s 5th Birthday Party

You’re Invited!

Event: Bryson’s Super-Duper 5th Birthday Party
Date: 6/10/17
Time: 2:15-3:45pm
Location: Fauna Park
Hosted by: Colby and Claire

Message: Friends, come help us celebrate Bryson’s 5th birthday at Fauna Park (weather permitting).

We will provide healthy and simple sandwiches (quinoa and raisin, raised-without-antibiotics turkey and huckleberry). This party will be peanut- and dairy- free. There will also be a gluten-free option, as well as a kosher meal choice.

For activities, the kids will be making a craft: raku-fired pottery. Wear comfortable clothes that you’re not afraid to get toxic resin on.

In lieu of birthday presents, you can make a donation in Bryson’s name to the Animal Rescue Federation. (He loves animals!)

Can’t wait to see you all next summer!
Colby and Claire

Some quick notes about Bryson’s birthday party:

1. Even though it’s still nine months away, it looks like it’s supposed to rain that day, so we’ve moved the party into our building’s community room. Because of the smaller space, the party will be in shifts. If your child’s name starts with the letters A through J, they will be attending Party #1, from 2:15 until 3pm, and letters K through Z will attend Party #2 from 3:00 to 3:45pm. Please be punctual!

2. And Bryson got wind of our “no presents” request and is flipping out. Kids, amiright? So we’ve prepared an Amazon wish list in case you’d like to get him a present (hint: he loves animals). If a bunch of you want to go in on one of the big-ticket items, that would be great. Bryson’s been begging for his own alpaca for months.

Thanks, guys!
Colby and Claire

It turns out the community room charges a nominal fee to host parties there, so we’re relocating the shindig to our front stoop. We will rent a tent (still cheaper than that “nominal fee”), but the raku pottery firing is out. Instead, we will be making metal sculptures using the soldering iron Bryson got as a gift from his Uncle Ted. (Thanks a lot, Ted!) Be sure to bring your favorite piece of scrap metal (like a soup can, hubcap, or shrapnel), and wear clothes you wouldn’t mind catching fire.

See you there!
Colby and Claire

Just a reminder, Bryson’s 5th birthday party is only six months away! If you haven’t replied to this invite yet, please do. We need to know how many blowtorches to rent.

Also, because of the high number of invitees, sandwiches are no longer cost-effective. Instead, we’ll be ordering pizza (including a gluten-free option and a kosher pie). When you RSVP, please include what topping you’d like on your pizza.

Colby and Claire

Update: seems to think that it will be sunny on 6/10, so we’re moving the party back to Fauna Park. For an activity, we’re planning a fun scavenger hunt around Eastern Meadow Lake. Be sure to wear rubber knee-high boots and clothes you don’t mind getting drenched in goose scat.

Also, instead of a cake, we will provide fresh fruit and dried fig tapenade, so if anyone has any allergies, let us know well in advance.

One more thing: Fauna Park doesn’t have any public restrooms available, so please make sure your kids go beforehand.

Okay, so Bryson is insisting that there be a cake. We really want this day to be special for Bryson, because you only turn 5 once. Of course, there will be gluten-free and kosher cakes available.

However, due to the large variety of pizza toppings requested, I think we need to simplify, so we’re eliminating the pizza. Really, 2:15pm isn’t a valid meal time anyway. There will still be tapenade and fresh fruit for the kiddos, and a water fountain is located by the Eastern Meadow playground. (But drink sparingly—no bathrooms!)

Okay, now the weather is saying “hail.” Hail?!!! Since when does it hail in June? Poor Bryson! The party is being moved back to our apartment stoop.

If you haven’t already purchased a gift for Bryson, we’ve set up an account on GoFundMyParty to help recoup some of the costs from planning this bash. No amount is too small!

Can’t wait to see everyone!
Colby and Claire

Just a reminder, you’ve RSVPed “Yes” to Bryson’s 5th birthday party tomorrow. The host would like to remind you to dress for inclement weather, and to bring your favorite haiku to share in the poetry slam.

We regret to inform you that the event: Bryson’s Super-Duper 5th Birthday Party has been canceled, due to the birthday boy having coxsackie. Click here if you’d like to send him a get-well card or donate to his wellness page.

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